Short smart and funny tweets

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Short smart and funny tweets.... Get them on Facebook

Total Records: 2512

	1000	Its crazee how he told me Im beautiful. Its crazee how he called me sexy last night. Its crazee he told me he loved me this morning. Its a damn shame hes your man.
	2664	Its funny how the person that puts the biggest smile on my face is also the person that brings the most tears to my eyes... #Sad
	473	freinds can be lover but lovers can not be freinds.
	1235	Statement of Love: The Kiss 1. Kiss on the hand.... I adore you 2. Kiss on the cheek... I just want to be friends 3. Kiss on the neck... I want you 4. Kiss on the lips... I love you 5. Kiss on the ears... I am just playing 6. Kiss anywhere else ... lets not get carried away 7. Look in your eyes ... kiss me 8. Pla........more
	1677	Men are like fine wine, women have to squeeze the shit out of them before they are acceptable to have dinner with!!

Top Rated Tweets

	1054	If one sychronized swimmer drowns do the rest all have to drown too?
	1055	If they say TVs so bad for you then why do they have one in every hospital room?
	1052	Im spending some quality time with my pilow... and doing my spelling too (zzzzzzz):-D
	1087	Studying. Notice how they conviently put "DYING" at the end of this word?
	1728	im so cool i make the ice cubes shiver!

Newly Added Tweets

	2680	# The first thing I always do when a cop pulls me over is remind him he can't arrest me without a warrant so he knows he's dealing with a pro
	2677	NEXT!!! Can I help you? Nah. I just stood in line to say hi.
	2671	If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
	2669	you tweet me, i tweet back, you don't reply. what's all that about? if you don't want to talk to me, don't tweet me in the first place.
	2668	i hope dis is just a nightmare. im gonna wake up & open my eyes..... 1, 2, 3.... it's not a dream. it's not a nightmare. it is HELL.....

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